I need to get my autistic son poop trained and we are out of ideas....

[NadiaRose]

My son is Autistic and is 4 years old. We managed to get him to go potty in the toilet but he is fighting the whole poop in the toilet thing. He would rather go in his pants or a diaper. He will hold it till he gets constipated if we keep him without a diaper. We tried cutting holes in the diaper but since being pee trained he will not sit on the toilet with anything on his behind. Our final idea was to try to give him a laxitive so that the decision to poop on the toilet would be out of his hands and he held it for more than 24 hours. We finally gave up and put a diaper back on him and he blew poop out the sides. My husband and I are all out of ideas. We have another baby on the way plus a 12 month old and I really don't want three kids in diapers. I was hoping that if anyone had any ideas you could let me know. I'm sure if he could just go poop in the toilet once or twice he would get the idea. It only took once to pee train him. Anyway, I look forward to any ideas anyone has. Thank you!

[LilMissy]

I know it sounds rough but try sheer bluntness like with my nephew when he wouldn't we let him poop his underwear and than he washes his underwear by hand. If he won't wash them leave them in a wastebasket near wear he sleeps so he can smell it or leave it in his bed. Remind him of hw other kids go in the toliet and how other kids laugh at kids who poop their pants. The whole peer pressure thing. Hope I don't sound too rough and hope I helped. :)

[NadiaRose]

The problem is that neither the smell or the feel of it in his pants really seems to bother him too much. He will go and hide to go and he goes at about the same time every day. We've tried to catch him in the middle of going but he just shuts down and won't go any more. He held out against ex lax for a day and a half. I just know if he went a couple of times in the toilet he would get the idea. He is always so proud of himself when he does something deemed good and strives to repeat it time and time again. We sit him on the potty sometimes for a couple hours at a time. Keeping him occupied with dvds and games on our laptop to try to get him to relax. He just won't go. If I were to put it next to his bed or anything like that he would probably get into it and play with it and get it all over. That is what he does when his diaper leaks. I don't think he quite gets the whole peer pressure thing. He only goes to his special education preschool a couple hours a day right now but they have told us he will be going to all day kindergarten next year and needs to be poop trained. We figured we better start trying hard core now so that he will be all ready for that and I won't have to deal with three kids in diapers come July when our next baby is due. It's for those reasons and others that I am more than willing to try just about anything now. I'm not sure if the harsher methods would work with my son becuase of his personality and what not but thank you for the suggestions and you did give me a little bit of an idea of my own that I haven't really tried to an extent yet. He wears underwear during the day and at night. Just not at his nap time when he poops. We put him in a diaper for that. I guess we could just do away with naps since he doesn't really sleep during them anyway and watch him really close maybe sitting him on the toilet frequently and praying he goes. Anyway, I'm still open for suggestions if anyone has got any. The more the better.

[tracylynn64]

Thank God I am not alone. My son is very intelligent and very verbal but refuses to go poop on the potty. He had the flu and we knew had to go because he had the runs and he threw such a fit and kicked and screamed that he threw up.It wasnt from the flu trust me. My hubby just thinks he is stubborn and trying to keep control but poop doesnt seem to bother him. He goes several times a day so it is getting ridiculus. I have an appt. at a child nurologist in march but that is the soonest they could see him. I need to g\et him potty trained before april when I lose my babysitter. Why do they go pee on the potty but not poop? He will poop on the floor before he will sit on the potty and that has started to become a problem if he doesnt have a pull up. I told him I would throw away his underwear if he poops in them so he just takes them off and goes on the floor. Guess that one didnt work. Help. He is so verbal that noone agrees taht he could be autistic but they dont live with the tantrums and the pooping. He is very loving and cuddly too which is not a sign. I am lost. Does anyone else have a child with only some of the symptoms?
Tracy

[NadiaRose]

It sounds like we have similar problems. I am so glad that my son only goes once a day. He has really good control over his bowels or something. My husband taught him to pee standing up in less that five minutes. I'm about to tear my hair out over the whole poop thing. I took away his nap so I could do away with the diapers and I'm trying to put him on the toilet every hour or so during the normal poop time and I get him to sit there with games and dvd's on my laptop but so far no luck. It's been a couple of days now since I've done away with diapers and so far no poop. He doesn't even wear a diaper at night when he sleeps. He is very cuddly and loves his hugs and kisses. He is verbal and very intelligent. He also had the multitude of tantrums. He just got diagnosed in October when he turned 4 because all of his previous pediatricians pleaded ignorance. It really makes me mad that it took so long. He is now making so much progress though, I just want to get the poop thing nipped in the bud.

[NadiaRose]

We are so excited! Our son finally pooped in the toilet for the first time! He has been pooping on the floor lately since I took his naps and diapers away. I am so happy we finally have progress!

[Maresa]

I too have been battling this issue with my Autistic 6 year old daughter Caitlin. Caity started kindergarten this year and from all reports she has been going number one and number 2 just fine at school. However, at home she will only pee in the potty, and poops several times a day in the pull ups. Recently she became a bit too excited when I was doing some grocery shopping. I was buying diapers for her 1 year old sister, when Caity spotted Dora The Explorer training pants. Boy sis she get excited much to my dismay. I tried explaining that big girls go in the potty, and she decided to throw one of her tantrums in the aisle by walking out of my sight. Needless to say I caved and bought the Dora pants for her to ease her anxiety. When we got home she proudly marched around modeling the new pants for myself and my husband. We just rolled our eyes! Sometimes these kids are just so funny, despite the exasperation we endure at times. All I can do right now is laugh about it. I hope that this is just a phase, and she will want to poop in the potty like the other kids do.

[NadiaRose]

I have been sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for my son to have to poop again. He's a pretty regular, once a day kind a boy. It usually only takes him a couple of tries to get something down. He was so proud of himself the other day when he went poop and we gave him gumdrops and lots of praise for it. I am hoping all the new transitions he will have this year won't set him back at all. We have a new baby coming, my husband will be gone a lot for Army stuff and he starts kindergarten in the fall.

LOL. Never in my life did I ever think that poop and other bodily functions would ever be a focal point. Now it consumes a big chunk of my day. It's so funny how life comes about. LOL

[tracylynn64]

How are you guys doing on the poopng ? I am so happy for you. Our school district has a preschool program and they are tr5ying to help me but any suggestions would be great. Feel free to email me with any advice.
Thanks,
Tracylynn

[NadiaRose]

[QUOTE=tracylynn64]How are you guys doing on the poopng ? I am so happy for you. Our school district has a preschool program and they are tr5ying to help me but any suggestions would be great. Feel free to email me with any advice.
Thanks,
Tracylynn[/QUOTE]

I was just sitting at my computer reading different threads and a light bulb just went off in my head. First I identified my sons comfort zones, he always went poop at the same time in the same place, during naptime in his diaper. Naptime was the only time he was allowed a diaper. Well, I just decided to take them both away then he couldn't rely on that in order to do his business. I ended up having to clean up poop off the floor about 4 times. We finally caught him in the middle of going and got him to the toilet in time and he seemed a little scared at first but once we gave him some candy and lots of praise, he was good to go. We also identified key indicators that would tell us when he would have to go until he catches on to his own body signals. He will generally start pulling at the butt of his pants and get really upset and that is when we know we need to make a mad dash for the toilet. Getting him to go the first time was key for my son cause he generally only has to do something a couple of times to really get the idea. It was also the hardest part. The main thing is paying really close attention to their body language and what currency will keep them going once you get them to go that first time and then gradually getting them to just do it on their own. For my son, his currency is always positive reinforcement. We start out with a candy reward and verbal praise, then just a verbal praise after a little while. We have been trying the whole poop thing for about a year now and it is so nice to have progress at long last. It has taken so much patience. It was only last Tuesday that he even went poop in the potty for the first time. If I wasn't pregnant and had some coordination I would have done a back hand spring or cart wheel or something. :p

[NadiaRose]

:D This is just a little update on my sons progress. He is now recognizing his own body's need to go poop. Now he just goes to the bathroom and puts his potty seat on the toilet and goes himself without us having to prompt him or watch for his body signals like a hawk. The only thing I have to do is go wipe his butt after he lets me know he's done. (thank God for those flushable wipes) I am working on him doing that himself though. We just want to make sure he remembers to always wash his hands afterward. I'm thinking we will put up a picture schedule for that. Anyway, we are just so happy to finally have overcome this milestone. We have been breakin our necks for a year to get this done and then with our last ditch effort it works in two weeks. Go figure......

[tracylynn64]

Our biggest problem is that he knows when he ahs to go poopy and asks for a pullup if he is wearing underwear. We tried to say no and that is when the floor pooping started. The lady at the school distric says to just give him the pullup for now until we can figure out the problem since that is much more acceptable to poop in a pullup than on the floor. I have to agree. But I am having a hard time finding someone who wants to watch a 4 yr. old who poops in his pants several times a day. I understand since sometimes I have to hold my breath to change him. We tried to rush him to the potty before but he gets so upset it becomes a worse ordeal. I guess this is going to be a long process. Thank God I have my faith to help me through all of these behaviors. Congratulations on your success.
Tracylynn

[joyani73]

Hi, guys! My name's Yani and I have a 3 years 3 month old boy who is the size of a 6 year old boy. We went to see a padetrician yesterday to get his height and weight checked, but the doc said that my son shows signs of autism. I was devastated, of course, but as a teacher, I've seen quite a number of autistic children in my career, and I know they require special attention. However, I didn't know what their childhood was like until I began to see the signs in my son.
Like some of yours, my son refused to poop in the toilet. My husband and I refused to use potty as we don't like to clear the mess in it. As my son is quite big (118 cm, 22 kg), we have already trained him to pee in the toilet bowl. He refused to do it standing up (he's been spending a lot of time with me, observing me coz my hubby's working shift work). After much coaxing, he has tried to pee standing after my demo. Kinda hilarious and absurd, but what the heck!
Anyway, he insists on wearing diapers each time he wants to poop. It makes it more difficult when he's staying with my mum during the day and i only see him after 5pm. He will beg his grandma to allow him to wear diapers, and like all soft-hearted grandmothers, she complied. That is something that frustrates me as I'm working, and can only work on his bowel movement during school holidays.
Sadly, my son is not fantastic with speech. He babbles a lot, just like babies do. :( He's now in nursery and after yesterday's feedback with the doc, I'll be seeing his teacher soon sometime next week. He'll have to go thru' some diagnostic testing of his condition sometime in June.
I'm praying that things will get better.
Yani

[AutMom]

Welcome to the group joyani73!....Keep us updated.

[NadiaRose]

[QUOTE=tracylynn64]Our biggest problem is that he knows when he ahs to go poopy and asks for a pullup if he is wearing underwear. We tried to say no and that is when the floor pooping started. The lady at the school distric says to just give him the pullup for now until we can figure out the problem since that is much more acceptable to poop in a pullup than on the floor. I have to agree. But I am having a hard time finding someone who wants to watch a 4 yr. old who poops in his pants several times a day. I understand since sometimes I have to hold my breath to change him. We tried to rush him to the potty before but he gets so upset it becomes a worse ordeal. I guess this is going to be a long process. Thank God I have my faith to help me through all of these behaviors. Congratulations on your success.
Tracylynn[/QUOTE]


You know, I had the same problem when I first tried to potty train my son a year ago, and that was just to pee in the toilet. We discovered he absolutely loves this game I have on my laptop when we tried this time around. I would take him into the bathroom and put him on his potty seat and bring my laptop in with us to play the game. He would sit as long as I played the game. He started associating the bathroom with playing the game which he thought of as fun and eventually sat there long enough to accidentally pee in the toilet. From then on we had no problems with getting him to go potty and it opened the door for sitting on the potty for longer periods of time. Now we don't even have to bother with the laptop. Since he associated the bathroom with getting to have fun it wasn't a huge fight to get him to sit there and try to poop. Basically it was getting him to think that sitting on the potty was fun. You could try finding something your child really loves and only let him see it or do it or watch it while sitting on the potty and then maybe he will be more willing. Just a thought. The major problem we had with the pooping wasn't getting him to sit there, it was like he didn't really understand what poop was or that his body was responsible for it or something. Then it was like all the pieces came together for him and BAM! Poop in the potty not in the diaper, or on the floor since I took his diaper away to get him poop trained and he pooped on the floor 4 times before he made it into the potty. My husband and I are still in shock that our boy is finally potty trained completely. He still gets a big ol Tootsie Roll and lots of praise for going in the potty. In the next week we'll probably bring it down to just praise but for now we waited so long for him to get to this point that he deserves a treat for not making mommy sick every time I had to change him.

[elsayednm]

Hi,

I need help too. My child is turning 5 in March and he is not toilet trained. He is passing 2 to 3 times a day. He is on casine and gluten free diet but he is so inteligent were he knows where to find biscuit and milk. I did my atmost efforts to help him but in vain. Nowadays he runs to the toilet and he make it in the ground. I believe may be this is the first step.

[all4autism mom]

Hi
I have twins that both would not go #2 in the toilet here in the last month one has started and gone every since what we did was start a star system i made up he gets a star when he has a good day at school or poops in potty i have a calander and he is aware when he earns a star we make a huge deal on another piece of paper we have a couple of picture of things he loves such as going skating or bowling playing video games and going to walmart beside of those we have it takes 5. 15 20 stars to earn this which ever. from day one he wanted to earn more stars he pooped from that day since.i know this will not work for everyone this system would not have worked last year for him keep trying it will happen once these guys get it they got it!

[Bethintx]

I'm glad you are finding an answer to this problem. My son is 13 and is just now starting to BM in the toilet. He still goes in his "pull-ups" most of the time, but at least he's starting. The next thing to get him to do is clean himself afterwards! He'll pull up his clean pull-ups over a messy bottom before I can go clean him up. He does just fine toileting in school. We even send him wearing underwear! I think the problem with my son and toileting is that he does not get embarrassed! He don't care if the other kids will call him a baby.

[BeccaG]

Looks like you are on your way! Wanted to share a little experience. May not apply to you but might to some other folks who are sharing toilet training problems. Ben is 18 now and it seems a long time ago! I remember wondering if he would ever be completely toilet trained! The thing that I noticed was that he would gallop for the bathroom, but wouldn't quite make it. We finally figured out that his lack of self monitoring was what was getting in his way. He just didn't sense that he needed to go til it was URGENT! Honoring his routine has been helpful as has gradual maturing, stronger muscles and figuring things out a little at a time together. Try not to get too caught up in the NT time frames! Can't say the self-monitoring has gotten all that much easier.

[samhill]

Hi. I am from the UK and have just had my 6 year old son diagnosed with Aspbergers. When we were told it wasn't such a shock because we always realised that there was something not quite right. But now we are trying to understand what we can do to give him the best we can. But I was really shocked to hear that other people are going through the same toileting problems that we are. I really thought that it was something that was ojnly happening to us. My son would rather mess himself at school, and be laughed at because he smells, then go to the toilet. Its heart breaking because kids are so cruel. But what we have found that helps, is to use their obsession against them. My son at the moment is crazy about playing a Star Wars game that my husband has. But if he messes himself he does not play it!! Its really hard, and I feel really mean saying no to him, but it seems to have done the trick. Although he does have good and bad days. Hope that this little bit of information is of some us to somebody.

[NadiaRose]

Just an update on my son. Its been a year now since he started pooping in the toilet and we have had no setbacks. He even tells us in public when he has to go and actually goes in whatever toilet wherever we happen to be. It's really nice considering I still have a 2 year old and a 6 month old in diapers.

[melsmommy]

Good luck with potty training. My daughter wasn't fully trained until she was 7 years old. We tried rewards, promised special outings, imposed consequences, and nothing worked; she simply went when she was ready.

[Tensing]

[QUOTE=LilMissy]I know it sounds rough but try sheer bluntness like with my nephew when he wouldn't we let him poop his underwear and than he washes his underwear by hand. If he won't wash them leave them in a wastebasket near wear he sleeps so he can smell it or leave it in his bed. Remind him of hw other kids go in the toliet and how other kids laugh at kids who poop their pants. The whole peer pressure thing. Hope I don't sound too rough and hope I helped. :)[/QUOTE]

I have to say I am shocked at this approach.

[Gibb1985]

I can tell you we had the exact same issue at the exact same age. Here is what worked for us. When your son is "ready" or "almost ready" take him in the bathroom, tell him is is sitting there - and that you will be outside the door. Nature will take over, it tookus 5 1/2 hours - bt he went on his own and never was it an issue again.
My son used to get a diaper when it was time to go- one day we "ran out"---and like I said nature took over.
Kids in this spectrum cannot control mch, they can control their bowels. One this mountain was climbed he was so proud.
Bring him a book and you too, have the tenacity to sit otside the door.
Good luck



[QUOTE=NadiaRose]My son is Autistic and is 4 years old. We managed to get him to go potty in the toilet but he is fighting the whole poop in the toilet thing. He would rather go in his pants or a diaper. He will hold it till he gets constipated if we keep him without a diaper. We tried cutting holes in the diaper but since being pee trained he will not sit on the toilet with anything on his behind. Our final idea was to try to give him a laxitive so that the decision to poop on the toilet would be out of his hands and he held it for more than 24 hours. We finally gave up and put a diaper back on him and he blew poop out the sides. My husband and I are all out of ideas. We have another baby on the way plus a 12 month old and I really don't want three kids in diapers. I was hoping that if anyone had any ideas you could let me know. I'm sure if he could just go poop in the toilet once or twice he would get the idea. It only took once to pee train him. Anyway, I look forward to any ideas anyone has. Thank you![/QUOTE]